How can you conclude every conversation on a high note?
How can you confirm for the other person that you have great taste?
How do you say, "Goodbye" and keep the doors wide open for future conversations?
A few lulls in conversation are natural and shouldn't make you feel you're uninteresting or not keeping up your end of the banter. However, when the lulls begin to seep into every few paragraphs, it's time for you to be proactive and end the dialogue in a way that leaves the other person still finding you as interesting as when the conversation began!
In the example here, I've used a first meeting. However, the four steps I've composed for you can be used in any conversation.
1. Restate something the other person said, or summarize the conversation. When possible, thank him or her for sharing some bit of information or news with you.
Why it's gracious: It lets the other person know you've been actively listening and interested in what has been said. It also reveals any possible miscommunication so that anything needing to be restated can be clarified.
As for thanking the other person, everyone appreciates knowing their words, information, or advice has been of benefit. Taking a moment to verbally express your thanks shows them they've been able to impact you (even if just in a little matter) in a positive way.
What you could say: Let's envision you just met a new parent at your child's school. The conversation begins by talking about the books your sixth-graders will be reading in literature class this year. Then the other parent tells about a book she just finished. Here's how you might begin to end the conversation.
"Rebecca, thanks for your recommendation! You made the book sound so suspenseful. Chicago is one of my favorite cities, so it will be interesting reading how the most cunning murderer of the 19th Century was caught there."
2. Verbally acknowledge that you enjoyed your time with the other person.
Why it's gracious: Everyone wonders about the impression they make on others. They'll appreciate (and know you have great taste!) when you acknowledge you've enjoyed being with them.
What you could say: "It's been a joy meeting you tonight. I'm so happy you came over and introduced yourself."
3. Mention the next time you hope to be with the person.
Why it's gracious: It's more positive reinforcement that you enjoyed the other person's company and that you're open to future interactions. (When chatting with someone you know you'll never meet again, leave this step out of the conversation.)
What you could say: "I look forward to seeing you at the next parent meeting. We'll compare book notes!"
4. Smile, use the other person's name, and shake hands as you say, "Goodbye."
Why it's gracious: Using the other person's name frequently in conversation, and especially when saying "Goodbye" sends the message that you've been tuned in to them, you want to remember them, and that you no longer consider them a stranger.
What you could say: "Goodbye, Rebecca. I hope you have a great rest of your evening!"
One more tip: Time can be your enemy. The best goodbyes are brief. Show the other person you know what "Goodbye" means and exit within seconds. As they say in Hollywood, "Leave them wanting more!"
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Hello and thank you for being part of the conversation! I'm glad and honored you're here and I read and relish each of your notes!